What do you wish to say yes to?
I wish to say yes to myself. To my needs and desires and dreams.
I spent several years in survival mode. There were car accidents, and sick parents and siblings, funerals, a friend becoming paralyzed, a friend getting divorced, working way too much to try to survive financially, so much crisis. When things settled down, it took me quite a while to realize "it's okay now" -- to even think about the possibility of trying to remember what normal felt like.
Much of 2010 was about processing the "it's okay now" of it all. About imagining a path back to liking my life. About trying to remember the last time things were going smoothly and how on earth I had made that happen.
For a long time, I felt completely crazy for believing that those times of crisis had literally changed my brain, but since I've learned a couple of things about neural pathways, I'm thinking that I was absolutely right. Research on the possibility of undoing the damage is in progress.
I need to take this year and focus on healing and getting my life back. That's what I need, and I'm saying yes to it.
